crisps and burgers made from dog shit don't contribute to bad skin at all

It is a common belief that what we stuff in our mouths to fuel our body is never seen again, except in the form of poo and urine. By this theory, we as a species have somehow made a huge evolutionary leap in the last 50 years: we are capable of processing the synthetic and toxic as well as the natural and wholesome. We can do this with not one sign being visible upon our person - our largest organ, the skin, will bear no testament to our ravenous shit-eatery.

Some dermatologists will have you believe you can pack a bunch of crap in your face and have no side effects. I find I feel rotten if I eat too much white bread or highly processed wheat products: my digestive system is not cut out for the demands wheat makes on it - and this is visited upon my skin.


Hormonal imbalances

For a while I was told my plooky chin was the result of an hormonal imbalance. But hang on! I'm 27 - not some flushed with new-found sex-hormones teenager. But I accepted that this was the reason - it didn't occur to me there was anything in my diet that was directly responsible for my chin woe.

A hormonal imbalance results from our blood sugar level being raised, which it is when the diet is over-rich in refined carbohydrates. These have a high GLYCAEMIC INDEX or LOAD. High blood sugar levels cause the pancreas to pump out more insulin, which triggers the release of male hormones (androgens, such as testosterone).

Basically, androgens stimulate greater secretion of of sebum from the sebaceous glands. As sensitivity to androgens increases, sebaceous gland activity is stepped up: this in turn leads to more blockages, more infections and more plooks.


Glycaemic Index (GI)

There is a diet doing the rounds at the moment called The South Beach Diet: it's premise is based on that of GI. While I can't be arsed with such things, I do firmly believe reducing in my intake of refined carbohydrates has had an enormous effect on my skin. Plus, my energy levels have soared and I no longer feel crap for half the day.

The GI index places foods along a scale of 1-100 - foods scoring closer to 100 are classed as having a high Glycaemic Index and are to be avoided or eaten in smaller, less frequent quantities. Those closer to 1 are low GI and are to be eaten in greater quantities.

The GI scale is based on how fast a certain food is able to release its energy - those that are quickly liberated of their energy trigger a rise in your blood sugar levels which raises the insulin levels.

A refined carbohydrate is made of little molecules, and can be easily absorbed into the blood stream. The result is a rapid rise in blood sugar levels. Complex carbohydrates take a lot more work to be broken down, as the large molecules have to be broken down into the tiny glucose molecules which make them up. This leads to a sustained blood sugar level and a subsequent constant level of insulin.

Think about it like Christmas - getting one large-boxed present: takes very little time to open - the anticipation is over. With many smaller-sized presents, the anticipation is sustained over a much longer time.

So if you're like me, too old for spots, but still getting them: try to reduce your refined carbohydrate intake - give it a month or so. I thought I'd die with out bread, but really, I don't miss it.


(Emotional stress contributes to bad skin - as an embryo, our skin develops from the neuroectoderm, which also forms into the brain and nerve tissue: it is essentially a nervous system on the outside of our bodies. See how skin reacts to fear? As we become confused, stressed, scared and not at ease with ourselves our skin reacts to the emotional pressure: spots.)

excellent site for more information on GI, plus a database of GI values

• scale of GI foods from low to high. For more, see here.